{"id":7449,"date":"2019-01-03T23:12:58","date_gmt":"2019-01-03T20:12:58","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.dijitaltopuklar.com\/?p=7449"},"modified":"2019-01-03T23:12:58","modified_gmt":"2019-01-03T20:12:58","slug":"turkiyede-babaligin-hep-yanlis-anlasilmasi","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/perihanciragoz.com\/dijitaltopuklar\/2019\/01\/turkiyede-babaligin-hep-yanlis-anlasilmasi\/","title":{"rendered":"T\u00fcrkiye\u2019de Babal\u0131\u011f\u0131n Hep Yanl\u0131\u015f Anla\u015f\u0131lmas\u0131"},"content":{"rendered":"

Kad\u0131nla alakal\u0131 her \u015fey gibi annelik de zaman i\u00e7inde ilgili ilgisiz herkesin yorumuna maruz kalm\u0131\u015f, s\u00fcrekli belli kal\u0131plara dahil edilmi\u015ftir. Geleneksel annelik malum \u201cyal\u0131n ayak ta\u015fa basma \u00e7ocum\u201d<\/em> kayg\u0131s\u0131nda, sa\u00e7\u0131n\u0131 s\u00fcp\u00fcrge eden \u015fefkat timsalinde toplan\u0131r. Ard\u0131ndan me\u015fhur \u201c\u00e7ocuk da yapar\u0131m kariyer de\u201d<\/em> slogan\u0131 dahilinde kad\u0131n\u0131n end\u00fcstriyel \u00e7al\u0131\u015fma hayat\u0131na dahili ve bir kenarda \u00e7ocu\u011funu da b\u00fcy\u00fctmesi te\u015fvik edilir. Kad\u0131n ekonomik \u00f6zg\u00fcrl\u00fc\u011f\u00fcn\u00fc eline almal\u0131 ama bu esnada ev i\u015flerini ve anneli\u011fi de ihmal etmemelidir. G\u00fcn\u00fcm\u00fczde art\u0131k pompalanan; anneler hem \u00e7al\u0131\u015fs\u0131n, hem \u00e7ocuk yaps\u0131n, hem bak\u0131ml\u0131 olsun, hem \u201corganik anne\u201d olsun. Giydirdi\u011fi tulumun y\u00fczde y\u00fcz pamuk olmas\u0131na \u00f6zen g\u00f6stersin, yo\u011furdunu da evde kendi mayalas\u0131n, ayn\u0131 zamanda son moda do\u011fum g\u00fcn\u00fc partilerini de organize etsin. Hem geleneksel hem modern, t\u00fcm kimlikleri bir arada bulundursun.<\/strong> Bu ak\u0131mda sosyal medyan\u0131n etkisi de yads\u0131namaz muhakkak.<\/p>\n

Peki kad\u0131nlar\/anneler \u00fczerindeki beklentiler her ge\u00e7en g\u00fcn katlanarak b\u00fcy\u00fcrken, bu arada babalardaki d\u00f6n\u00fc\u015f\u00fcm nedir? Babalardan beklenen neydi, nas\u0131l de\u011fi\u015fti? \u00d6n\u00fcm\u00fczdeki de\u011fi\u015fimin neye evrilmesi bekleniyor?<\/p>\n

Babalar\u0131m\u0131z\u0131n aksine, bizim neslin babalar\u0131 \u00e7ocuklar\u0131n\u0131 sahiplenir oldular. \u201cAnnene sor\u201d c\u00fcmlesi giderek yerini \u201cnas\u0131l yapsak\u201dlara b\u0131rak\u0131yor.<\/strong> Art\u0131k parklarda (\u00f6zellikle de hafta sonlar\u0131) daha \u00e7ok baba var. Daha en ba\u015f\u0131nda hamilelikteki doktor kontrollerine kad\u0131nlar art\u0131k kendi anneleri veya kay\u0131nvalideleriyle de\u011fil bu bebekle ilgili birinci di\u011fer \u00f6zne olan babayla gidiyorlar.<\/p>\n

Bu yeni kocalar<\/em> bir \u00f6nceki nesil taraf\u0131ndan yer yer pek takdir ediliyor: \u201cAyol bizim damat pek ilgili, k\u0131z emziriyor, damat gaz\u0131n\u0131 \u00e7\u0131kar\u0131yor.\u201d<\/em> D\u00fcnyadaki en adil i\u015fb\u00f6l\u00fcm\u00fc erke\u011fin yapt\u0131\u011f\u0131 dev bir fedak\u00e2rl\u0131km\u0131\u015f gibi lanse ediliyor, oras\u0131 ba\u015fka konu. Ayar\u0131n ka\u00e7t\u0131\u011f\u0131 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcl\u00fcyorsa \u015fayet inceden ele\u015ftiriliyor: \u201c\u0130nan\u0131r m\u0131s\u0131n kakas\u0131n\u0131 bile de\u011fi\u015ftiriyor, bu kadar\u0131 da ne bileyim, biraz \u015fey…\u201d<\/em> T\u00fcm bu takdirler ve ele\u015ftirilerle birlikte babal\u0131\u011f\u0131n da d\u00f6n\u00fc\u015fen bir yerde oldu\u011fu muhakkak, \u00e7\u00fcnk\u00fc bu zaten ka\u00e7\u0131n\u0131lmaz.<\/p>\n

Gel gelelim olmas\u0131 gerekti\u011fi \u015fekilde ebeveyn olan babalar \u201cbaba kimli\u011fine\u201d halel getirdikleri i\u00e7in ele\u015ftiriliyorlar.<\/strong> \u00d6ncelikle de\u011fi\u015fmesi gereken baba kelimesine y\u00fcklenen anlam ve \u00e7a\u011fr\u0131\u015ft\u0131rd\u0131klar\u0131d\u0131r. Bu toplumda birinden \u201c\u00e7ok baba adamd\u0131r\u201d<\/em> diye bahsetti\u011finizde o ki\u015finin \u015fefkatle bak\u0131m veren bir kimli\u011fi oldu\u011funu vurgulamazs\u0131n\u0131z. Baba adamlar, korur kollar, otoriterdir, muktedirdir. S\u00fcleyman Demirel\u2019dir baba, M\u00fcsl\u00fcm G\u00fcrses\u2019tir. A\u011f\u0131rl\u0131\u011f\u0131 olur baban\u0131n, agucuk bugucuk yapmaz baba dedi\u011fin. \u0130\u015fte de\u011fi\u015fmesi gereken tam olarak bu. \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc babal\u0131k, erkekli\u011fin d\u00f6n\u00fc\u015fmesindeki en \u00f6nemli ayg\u0131tlardan biri. Baba fig\u00fcr\u00fcn\u00fc d\u00f6n\u00fc\u015ft\u00fcrmeyi ba\u015farabilirsek erkekli\u011fi d\u00f6n\u00fc\u015ft\u00fcrmek konusunda da \u00e7ok yol alabiliriz.<\/strong><\/p>\n

A\u00e7ev\u2019in haz\u0131rlad\u0131\u011f\u0131 Erkeklik ve Babal\u0131k Halleri Raporu<\/em> bu d\u00f6n\u00fc\u015f\u00fcme dair umut vaat ediyor. Raporda (1) geleneksel, (2) yeni geleneksel, (3) hevesli\/gayretli ve (4) \u00e7izgi d\u0131\u015f\u0131 olmak \u00fczere d\u00f6rt tip babal\u0131k ortaya koyulmu\u015f. Bu kategorilerin neye tekab\u00fcl ettikleri isimlerinden de anla\u015f\u0131l\u0131yor malum. 4. kategoriye \u201c\u00e7izgi d\u0131\u015f\u0131\u201d ad\u0131n\u0131n koyulmas\u0131 bu t\u00fcr babal\u0131\u011f\u0131n b\u00fct\u00fcn\u00fcyle e\u015fitlik\u00e7i, \u00e7ocuklar\u0131yla ili\u015fkisinde mesafeleri tamamen kald\u0131rm\u0131\u015f olmas\u0131ndan kaynaklan\u0131yor, \u00e7\u00fcnk\u00fc y\u00fczy\u0131llard\u0131r in\u015fa edilmi\u015f olan \u201c\u00e7izgi\u201dnin \u00e7ok d\u0131\u015f\u0131nda bir duru\u015f bu. \u00c7izgi d\u0131\u015f\u0131 addedilen babal\u0131k toplumun genelini ifade etmede \u00e7ok yetersiz kalsa da hevesli\/gayretli babaya y\u00f6neltilen yakla\u015f\u0131m olduk\u00e7a memnun edici. Babal\u0131k d\u00f6n\u00fc\u015f\u00fcyor, dolay\u0131s\u0131yla erkeklik d\u00f6n\u00fc\u015f\u00fcyor.<\/p>\n

Uzun s\u00fcre Anneler G\u00fcn\u00fc’nde annelere al\u0131nan ev i\u015flerine ili\u015fkin hediyelerin toplumsal cinsiyet rolleri a\u00e7\u0131s\u0131ndan ne kadar sorunlu oldu\u011fu tart\u0131\u015ft\u0131k. \u015e\u00fck\u00fcr ki \u015fimdi \u201co mutfak robotunu kafana f\u0131rlat\u0131r\u0131m\u201d noktas\u0131na varabildik. \u015eimdi art\u0131k \u201cbabana al sen o robotu\u201d diyebilmenin vakti. Babalar G\u00fcn\u00fc i\u00e7in sunulan hediye \u00f6nerileri de babal\u0131\u011f\u0131 in\u015fa etmede \u00e7ok belirgin mesajlar verir. \u00c7akmak, c\u00fczdan, tesbih \u00fc\u00e7l\u00fcs\u00fcnden olu\u015fan setlerin betimledi\u011fi baba fig\u00fcr\u00fc sigara i\u00e7er, paras\u0131 vard\u0131r ve racon (!) bilir. Hukuk, sosyoloji, medya t\u00fcm disiplinlerden yap\u0131lan \u00e7al\u0131\u015fmalar\u0131n topyekun bu meseleye e\u011filmesiyle h\u0131zl\u0131 sonu\u00e7 al\u0131nabilir.<\/p>\n

Y\u0131llar evvel bir kad\u0131n \u00f6rg\u00fct\u00fcn\u00fcn d\u00fczenledi\u011fi, kat\u0131l\u0131mc\u0131lar\u0131n %90\u2019\u0131n\u0131n kad\u0131n oldu\u011fu bir \u015fiddet at\u00f6lyesinde biri demi\u015fti ki \u201ckad\u0131nlarla yeterince \u00e7al\u0131\u015ft\u0131k, art\u0131k erkeklerle \u00e7al\u0131\u015fma vakti.\u201d<\/strong> Oklar kad\u0131nlardan al\u0131n\u0131p erkeklere d\u00f6nd\u00fcr\u00fcld\u00fc\u011f\u00fcnde, erkekli\u011fi d\u00f6n\u00fc\u015ft\u00fcrd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcm\u00fczde tad\u0131ndan yenmeyecek.<\/p>\n

\u2666<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Kad\u0131nla alakal\u0131 her \u015fey gibi annelik de zaman i\u00e7inde ilgili ilgisiz herkesin yorumuna maruz kalm\u0131\u015f, s\u00fcrekli belli kal\u0131plara dahil edilmi\u015ftir. Geleneksel annelik malum \u201cyal\u0131n ayak ta\u015fa basma \u00e7ocum\u201d kayg\u0131s\u0131nda, sa\u00e7\u0131n\u0131 s\u00fcp\u00fcrge eden \u015fefkat timsalinde toplan\u0131r. Ard\u0131ndan me\u015fhur \u201c\u00e7ocuk da yapar\u0131m kariyer de\u201d slogan\u0131 dahilinde kad\u0131n\u0131n end\u00fcstriyel \u00e7al\u0131\u015fma hayat\u0131na dahili ve bir kenarda \u00e7ocu\u011funu da b\u00fcy\u00fctmesi […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":7,"featured_media":7450,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[15,32],"tags":[115,136,137,306,499,670,753],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/perihanciragoz.com\/dijitaltopuklar\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7449"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/perihanciragoz.com\/dijitaltopuklar\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/perihanciragoz.com\/dijitaltopuklar\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/perihanciragoz.com\/dijitaltopuklar\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/7"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/perihanciragoz.com\/dijitaltopuklar\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=7449"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/perihanciragoz.com\/dijitaltopuklar\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7449\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/perihanciragoz.com\/dijitaltopuklar\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/7450"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/perihanciragoz.com\/dijitaltopuklar\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=7449"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/perihanciragoz.com\/dijitaltopuklar\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=7449"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/perihanciragoz.com\/dijitaltopuklar\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=7449"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}